Ian's Top 5 Playstation Portable Predictions For '08

There has been an incredible amount of important announcements coming out of CES and here's what they're not telling you. There are big things on the horizon for the Playstation Portable in '08 based on what I thought I heard, maybe...

Number 5

Sony, desperate to enter the automotive market, will enable the Playstation Portable to run diagnostics on your car's engine. Think of the PSP as the Tricorder of the automotive industry. You'll be thanking Sony for saving you a ton of money on car repairs.

Number 4

Edible PSP cartridges. Sony is always trying to find ways to be a good global citizen and will introduce cartridges never to end up in a landfill. These special UMD game and movie cartridges will be used to upload the content directly to a memory stick before human consumption.

Number 3

Downloading content directly from your brain. The engineers at SCEA will soon implement an attachment for the PSP unit allowing connectivity from the handheld to your brain and vice-versa. Small, circular, adhesive electrodes similar to those used to monitor your heart, will simply stick to the forehead of the user and they will be able to download their thoughts directly to their PSP. You'll never have a song stuck in your head again - simply download to your PSP.

Number 2

Human batteries. This is not the Matrix. However, batteries will be a thing of the past thanks to human touch battery technology or HTBT. This incredible new technology will enable energy to transfer the fingertips of a PSP user harnessing the energy of the human body. Considering the amount of time PSP game players clutch their favorite handheld units, the only concern is that some players may lose too much energy from their bodies threatening to shut down vital organs.

Number 1

PSP will convert to a hoverboard. You heard me Olivia Munn, a hoverboard. Years in the making, this difficult conversion will be possible thanks to cooperation between Playstation Portable designers and developers, and top special effects masters from several of Hollywood film studios. With the push of a few buttons (and a $20,000,000 conversion package sold separately) PSP owners will be flying inches above the ground. Can you say the biggest thing to happen, ever? This writer can (in solidarity with Olivia Munn, of course).

Pretty amazing stuff, I'm sure you'll agree. Here's what we know is coming.

Skype
Downloadable, lower-resolution Blu-ray movies
GPS
A keyboard...

As much as I'd love for the PSP to turn into a hoverboard, reality has me hoping the folks at SCEA will somehow give us the opportunity to use the PSP as a high-end e-reader. Everything is there and all they need now is a crack developer to make it happen. So, we at PSP World would love to know what you think is on the horizon for Playstation Portable? What would you like to see?