PSP World

A diet of Duke Nukem one-liners can be pretty intense, but due to some legal problems, makers of the PSP Game Critical Mass have had to trim down the Duke content to catastrophic levels. And that's too bad, because the planned game, which was originally going to make up part of a trilogy -- actually looked pretty good (screenshot below).

Gamers were delighted when developers Gearbox Software and publisher Take Two lifted the beleaguered franchise from the inept hands of 3D Realms, who worked on the title for over a decade without actually producing a playable product. Unfortunately, due to changes in the original licensing agreement, the makers of two planned handheld versions of the game no longer have the rights to use Duke's swaggering likeness.

Frontline Studios broke the news to fans in a recent newsletter, stating that they still plan to release the games under a different name:

"Duke Nukem Critical Mass on DS and PSP consoles are not going to happen after all (feel free to ask why!)," the developer wrote. "But fear not - we're still releasing the games. It's just now called Extraction Point: Alien Shootout."

We're not exactly inspired by the new name, but I suppose true fans could just cover the loading screen with their hands and pretend they were still playing as the Duke. Unless his character has been replaced by a skinny, emo hipster who dispatches his enemies with carefully timed irony rather than pure brawn. In that case, we will be in cryogenic deepfreeze until society once again needs us.

"OK, OK, What if the Pigs are actually like, totally uncool accountants, and we're like 'whatever brohim, I heard Banana Republic was having a clearance sale.'"